Blindness
by rossansguil
Summary: After returning from Mount Weather, the people of Camp Jaha face the challenges of settling on the ground.
1. The World at My Feet

Lincoln found Octavia in the Ark, crouched down with her ear pressed to a vent. Raven mentioned once that it was a great place to eavesdrop, and since then there was always a kid in that position during council meetings.

Octavia had been there since Jackson kicked her out of Medical for being disruptive.

She was practically vibrating with panic and anxiety, had been ever since Miller limped back into camp saying that a group of Grounders had taken Bellamy and left him for dead.

Lincoln crouched next to her, placing a gentle hand on her back.

"They're not going to send anyone after him," Octavia said without prompting. "After everything he's done, they're just going to abandon him."

"Then you and I will go," Lincoln said, standing up, then holding out his hand and pulling Octavia up as well. Octavia lead them out of the Ark, heading towards their tent.

She nodded her head a couple of times but stopped abruptly.

"No, just me," she told him.

Lincoln made to protest, but Octavia stopped him before he could even begin.

"You need to stay here. Without Bellamy, someone needs to stay here and keep everything together, keep everyone safe."

She left the next night. Raven had convinced her to wait. She was sure she could appeal to Abby about sending out a search party, but had walked out of Medical shaking her head.

Harper was on guard duty and nodded at Octavia when the coast was clear.

Raven hugged her before she left.

"Be safe. Bring him home," she said before handing Octavia a radio and a gun "just in case."

Octavia walked out of Camp Jaha in the middle of the night with a blade strapped to her back, a knife in her belt and a gun tucked in the waistband of her pants.

"I wouldn't wanna be the guy who meets her alone in the woods," Raven said to Lincoln standing beside her.

"Hopefully she'll meet several, to show the strength of the Sky People."

His tone made Raven raise an eyebrow at him. "You think Grounders are gonna attack the camp?"

"I don't know anything for sure, but taking Bellamy was deliberate. It's an act of war."

"I guess we should start preparing for war then. Again."

Clarke hadn't seen another person in weeks. She'd stumbled upon a group of displaced Grounders and ended up spending most of the night treating a variety of illnesses and ailments in exchange for a meal and some knowledge of the area. They didn't ask who she was and she didn't offer that information, but she had a feeling they knew who she was anyway.

She had moved on since then, going as far away as she could from any sign of civilization.

So when she heard a branch snap she was expecting a deer to run by. She wasn't expecting another human, much less the actual person standing in front of her.

"Clarke?"

"Octavia, how did you find me?"

Octavia looked surprised and then disappointed before she settled in an angry scowl.

"I wasn't looking for you," she seemed to debate with herself before continuing, "Is Bellamy here?"

"No, why would he be?"

"He went hunting last week and didn't came back."

There was a stretch of silence. Clarke didn't know how to respond. Octavia looked at her with accusing eyes and then turned away.

"Wait, Octavia, I'm coming with you."

"Like hell you are, I can find my brother myself." Octavia took a few more steps before turning around to face Clarke. "Why do you even care anyway? You left. You've been gone for six months."

"I had to leave-"

"Yeah, Bellamy's given me the lecture like five times. Honestly, Clarke, I don't care. I don't care about you. I care about finding Bellamy and I don't need your help."

"You do. You're too far from camp, alone, in unknown territory."

Octavia rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You want to follow me, fine. But don't act like it's for my benefit."

She continued forward taking fast, long strides while Clarke jogged to catch up. The silence between them was oppressive for Clarke. After being alone for so long it seemed unnatural to be silent with another person around.

"Why was Bellamy hunting all the way up here?" Clarke asked when her composure finally broke.

"He wasn't," Octavia replied. Her tone was clipped and Clarke wasn't sure she'd continue, but she did after taking a deep breath.

"Miller said they were about four miles north of the dropship when they were ambushed by a group of Grounders. I had been tracking them from there, but I lost their trail a while back."

Clarke nodded but was unsure on how to keep the conversation going so she let it drop instead. Octavia didn't seem to mind.

They stopped to make camp before the sun set. It wasn't until it was dark that either one of them said anything again.

"I'm surprised you're not with Lexa," Octavia said nonchalantly. She was sitting across the fire from her, sliding a whetstone across her blade.

"Why would I be with Lexa?"

"Well I mean she left you, you left us. Birds of a feather or whatever."

"Lexa betrayed me."

Octavia looked up, looked Clarke straight in the eyes. Her anger crackled fiercely along with the fire.

"Like I said, birds of a feather."

* * *

The beatings were new. They had starved him in the beginning, denied him water for a while. They were going to use every tactic they could to break him, to get him to talk. Bellamy was determined to die first.

Who they were, he wasn't sure exactly. Bellamy made a point not to hear their questions. He focused on anything he could except the voices of the two men in the room with him.

Somewhere in the village a baby was crying. He thought there was something profound in that, in the fact that not far from where he was being tortured there was a mother comforting a child. He never got the chance to figure out what exactly was so profound about it, though, since the next punch to the face knocked him unconscious.

* * *

When Clarke woke up the next morning the fire had been put out and their campsite nearly completely cleared. Octavia was sitting on her pack, staring at an open book in her lap, impatiently waiting for Clarke to wake up.

"What's that?" Clarke asked as she sat up.

"A book," Octavia replied stubbornly.

"Obviously. What's in it?"

Octavia turned the book towards her. The two pages made up a map of, from what Clarke could tell, their surrounding area.

"Lincoln said that, given the area that Miller said they were in, it was possible the grounders took Bellamy to this village."

Octavia tapped the top of the page. Next to a long blue line of the river was a little group of squares representing the village.

"Should be easy to find. Looks like all we have to do is follow the river north."

"Lincoln said only to use the river as a reference point. He said there's a lot of flooding this time of year and the river could be unpredictable and dangerous."

Octavia chose the path they'd take though Clarke still thought they'd be better off closer to the river. She didn't complain though. She knew exactly what Octavia would tell her if she did.

* * *

Bellamy woke up to something cool and wet being pressed against his face. He opened his eyes to find a familiar face hovering over his. It was Echo, the grounder woman from Mount Weather.

"If you tell them what they want to know they'll release you," she said when she noticed he was awake. She was gently cleaning the cuts on his face with a damp cloth.

"If I tell them what they want to know they'll kill my people," Bellamy told her, jerking angrily out of her grasp.

"Maybe if you just told them where Clarke was-"

"I don't know what Clarke is!"

Echo didn't flinch at his outburst, but her eyes softened. Bellamy looked away from her.

"That's the truth. That's the only thing I'll tell you."

"You should trust me."

"Grounders haven't really proven themselves to be trustworthy."

"I don't want them to kill you."

"Then help me escape."

"If I do that then they'll kill me."

"I guess that proves my point about the whole trust thing then, doesn't it?"

"I could go to your people, to get you help."

Bellamy let out a humorless laugh, shaking his head. He could see what was happening. They couldn't beat the answers out of him so they were trying another way, hoping that he'd spill his guts to a pretty face.

"I'm not going to tell you where my people are either."

With a sigh, Echo stood and walked out the door, leaving Bellamy conscious and alone for the first time in days.

* * *

"What's it like having a brother?" Clarke asked, breaking the silence.

They had been hiking up a rocky hill for the better part of the afternoon. Clarke's legs were aching and she needed a distraction.

Octavia was quiet and Clarke was about to ask again when she took a deep breath and started talking.

"I've never really thought about it." She hesitated for a minute before continuing. "I guess it's like always knowing that there's someone who will support you unconditionally. I don't know, I don't think it's really something you can put into words."

She stopped there and Clarke knew not to push her on the subject, but it seemed that Octavia was going to push back either way.

"You know, Bellamy's never left me before you sent him to Mount Weather. I'd never watched him walk away from me without knowing if he'd ever come back."

"He left to save our friends, to keep you safe."

"He left because you told him to."

The sharp edge returned to Octavia's voice.

"You don't get it do you? He would do anything for you. Everything that happened in Mount Weather, he did for you. And then you just left."

"Octavia, what I am gonna have to do to get you to stop hating me?"

"There's nothing you can do. Maybe I could have forgiven you for TonDC, but for the way you treated Bellamy, for hurting him, I can't forgive you for that."

"And how exactly have I treated him?"

"Like he was disposable. He could have died in that mountain a hundred times over."

"But he didn't."

"No but he lost a piece of himself in there. He killed so many people before we even got there and it haunts him. He'd never admit it, not to me at least, but it does."

Clarke stopped in her tracks. She finally understood exactly why Octavia was so hostile towards her. Clarke chose to carry her burden alone. She didn't think about how she had forced Bellamy to do the same. She wasn't sure she could continue following Octavia up the hill with the heavy weight of that realization now resting on her shoulders.


	2. Swallow Your Words

Bellamy was surprised when, a few hours later, there was a large commotion outside the tent and Echo returned. She cut the rope that was binding his wrists together before tossing something cloth at his feet.

"Put that on and follow me. Quickly!"

The cloth turned out to be a cloak of sorts. Bellamy threw it over his shoulders and pulled up the hood. Echo peeked out of the tent before lifting the flap and motioning him to follow her.

It was smoky outside and people were running frantically towards the source of the smoke. He and Echo joined the crowd but, instead of continuing on to where the tents started to get denser, they were able to veer off and disappear into the woods.

They walked through the woods in silence until they were far enough away from the little village that they couldn't hear even a murmur of the chaos they left behind. That's when Bellamy felt safe enough to talk. He kept his hood up though.

"What the hell happened back there?" he asked, keeping his voice low.

"I started a small fire to distract everyone so we could escape," Echo told him. She didn't bother to keep her voice down. She had lifted her hood as well. She apparently felt much more comfortable with their situation than Bellamy did.

"'We?'"

"They're not my people. They took me the same as they took you. The only difference was that I told them what they wanted to hear."

"Like what?" Bellamy asked, but Echo just looked at him with narrowed eyes and shook her head.

Bellamy decided to let the matter drop.

"Where are we going?" he asked.

"I'm going home, to the Ice Nation. You can come with me or you can go your own way."

"I have no idea where we are."

"Then you should come with me."

He nodded and they fell back into silence.

They stopped when it got dark. Bellamy watched Echo make a small fire for them silently. In fact, they had spent most of their time in silence. Neither of them seemed to have the energy or motivation to keep up any semblance of conversation.

Once they were settled in front of the fire, that seemed to change.

"I never got the chance to thank you," Echo said.

Bellamy shrugged. "Things didn't exactly go according to plan."

"Thank you."

"Thank you, for everything." Bellamy stopped for a minuted, not sure if he should broach the subject. But with nothing else to talk about he decided to just go for it. "Do you know why they took us? The grounders, why they took us."

"They were trikru, trying to find out what really happened at the mountain. From what I heard, many people are unhappy with how the Commander handled things. They're trying to find a way to strip her of her command."

Bellamy opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. He wasn't sure how to process this information. Echo, however, grabbed his arm, nails digging into his skin. Bellamy gave her a questioning look to which she responded by tapping her ear, indicating she'd heard something, something that didn't belong.

Whispers. They seemed to be coming from the small clearing to their right. Cautiously, Bellamy and Echo left their campfire, creeping towards where the treeline ended.

In the clearing stood Octavia and Clarke.

* * *

Her eyes met his as soon as he walked out into the open. It seemed fitting to Clarke that they were the ones looking for Bellamy but he ended up being the one that found them.

She stayed standing where she was when they caught sight of him, Octavia ran and launched herself into her brother's arms.

"You look rough," Clarke said as she approached Bellamy by the fire.

And he did look rough. His face was covered in bruises and cuts that still had dried blood on them. The firelight only seemed to make it worse, casting shadows over his face that only emphasized his wounds.

Clarke hesitated to sit next to him, but Bellamy wasn't having it. He patted the ground next to him. He ignored the glare Octavia shot him from across the fire. She sat next to Echo, trying to find out as much as she could about the Ice Nation and how the Ark could work with them. He knew Octavia didn't approve of him letting Clarke back into his life so easily.

"You okay?" he asked her.

She nodded, but didn't say anything. They both fell silent, staring into the fire. This felt familiar though. They seemed to bring a much needed calm to each other. It was nice, peaceful, but Clarke needed to know what the hell happened to him.

"What were you even doing out there, Bellamy?"

"I was looking for Mecca Station. Monroe swears that she saw it come down, but we haven't been able to find any wreckage."

"Octavia said that you were hunting."

"Yeah, well. Kane wouldn't authorize a search party."

"So, you just decided to go on your own."

"Miller was with me."

She gave him a disbelieving look out of the side of her eye.

Bellamy sighed. "It just seemed simple, you know? Find the rest of our people and bring them home. After everything, I just want something to be simple for once."

Clarke placed a hand on his. "You shouldn't put all of it on yourself, Bellamy."

"You're one to talk."

"I guess that's something we should both work on then."

* * *

Echo left them the next morning as their paths parted ways, confident that she could make it back to the Ice Nation on her own.

Clarke walked behind Bellamy and Octavia, staring at the backs of their heads. Every step she took became more difficult than the last. She couldn't go back to Camp Jaha. She wasn't ready yet, to look everyone in the eye. She wasn't ready to be reminded of everything she had to do so that her people could be there.

Just when she was starting to think she could make a run for it, Bellamy turned his head to look back at her. He saw how far behind them she was and stopped, grabbing Octavia's arm to stop her as well.

"Clarke, what's wrong?" Bellamy asked, though from the look on his face Clarke could tell that he already knew what she was going say.

"I can't," was all she could get out. And that was enough for Octavia.

"Are you seriously doing this again?" Octavia didn't try to disguise the venom in her voice.

She waited for an answer, but the lump in Clarke's throat wouldn't let her give one.

After a long silence, Octavia turned and continued to Camp Jaha, leaving Bellamy and Clarke alone.

"I'm sorry," Clarke said, finally letting the words slip from her lips.

Bellamy just nodded once and said "Come back when you can," before turning away from her and following Octavia down the path towards home.

Clarke just nodded as he stepped back from her. She wasn't sure if anything other than a sob would come out of her mouth if she tried to say anything, but she also wasn't sure there was anything for her to say.

For the first time, Clarke watched Bellamy walk away from her. And for Bellamy, it wasn't any easier to walk away from her as it was to watch her leave.


	3. Only Possibilities

_One month later_

It was turning out to be another tense council meeting. Only fifteen minutes in and Bellamy was already anxious to leave. After finally finding some survivors from Agro Station, they faced a logistics problem. How were they going to keep everyone alive through the winter?

Bellamy ran a hand over his face, trying to find a more reasonable reason to not move into Mount Weather for the winter other than _I don't want to live in a place where I killed everyone_ when commotion at the gate interrupted them.

They all stepped outside just in time for Miller to run up to them.

"What's going on?" Kane asked.

"There's a group of grounders at the front gate. They want to talk to Bellamy."

There were about fifteen of them and most of them were on foot, leading horses pulling carts. At the front was a familiar face, Echo, sitting tall on gray horse.

"Did the commander send you?" Bellamy asked, walking up to the unopened gate.

"No," she answered. "We've come in defiance of her."

Bellamy raised an eyebrow and looked over to Kane, who nodded back.

"Open the gate."

* * *

Echo stood in front of the council, explaining the discourse between the grounder clans.

"Nothing is as it was," Echo said. "The alliance between the twelve clans is fracturing. We united to better protect ourselves from the mountain men but now there are no mountain men. Many warriors feel that the commander denied them of their right to seek retribution for the wrongs we have suffered. Many of the other leaders are worried about creating an enemy of the sky people. The queen believes that breaking the alliance with the sky people was a mistake given the outcome of events. It brings dishonor to our people but also distrust. If she is willing to break on alliance what is stopping her from breaking another?"

"Why exactly are you here?" Abby asked. "We're not looking for another war."

"War is inevitable. That said, neither are we. The commander may have united the twelve clans but she does not control us. The Ice Nation is extending a hand of friendship."

"Why?" Abby asked again, her voice was hard and her tone was clipped.

"Because friendship is the only guarantee of peace." Something softened in her eyes, just barely noticeable. "And also because Bellamy saved my life when he had no reason to and I have done the same for him. As individuals, we've created a bond of friendship. And I believe that, as a people, we could do the same."

"What exactly would this _friendship_ entail?" Kane asked, finally speaking up.

"The queen does not want to see such a strong potential ally to die from cold and starvation. My men and I are here to help you through the winter."

Everyone exchanged looks while Echo kept her eyes on Kane.

"If you could leave us for a minute, we'd like to discuss this among ourselves."

"Of course," Echo bowed her head as she left the room.

"What do you two think?" Kane asked, directing the question to Octavia and Lincoln after the door was closed.

"The Ice Nation are a ruthless people." Lincoln told him.

"More ruthless than your people?"

"Yes."

"Clarke told me some of the things Lexa shared with her about the other clans. Ruthless would be putting it lightly." Abby said.

"With their help though, we'll have better odds at surviving the winter, right?" Octavia asked, directing her question mostly at Lincoln. He nodded back at her.

"Why did you save her?" Kane asked Bellamy.

Bellamy pauses, searching for an answer that would satisfy them. There hadn't been a strategy to it, it had just been an instinct.

"Because she was scared."

Octavia rolled her eyes and scoffed at him. They had had many talks about his hero complex and he had a feeling he was in store for another once this was over.

"Do you trust her?" Kane continued on, ignoring Octavia's outburst.

Bellamy nodded. "She saved my life, too."

"Marcus, you're not seriously considering trusting these people?" Abby interjected.

"I don't think it really matters in the long run, does it? They're already here and we do need their help."

Abby looked at him sternly but didn't argue. The matter was settled.

"I don't think anyone was really expecting you to be so reasonable," Bellamy said as he walked Echo back to the Ark to finish their meeting.

"You sky people should stop underestimating us."

"I think we're starting to get that."

"I'm surprised Clarke isn't here with you," Echo said as they walked back into the Ark.

"No, she didn't come back with us. And we didn't tell anyone that we'd seen her."

"I won't say anything then."

"I'd appreciate that, thank you."

Bellamy opened the door to the meeting room and allowed her to enter before him.

* * *

"You need to stop," Octavia said as she barged into Bellamy's tent. She had hoped to find him still asleep. Even though he never told her, she knew he had been having nightmares almost every night since they left the mountain.

"Stop what?"

"The whole risking your life to save others thing. You need to stop. I can't lose you, okay? We can't lose you. With Clarke gone-"

Bellamy walked over and hugged her. "You're not gonna lose me, O."

"I am if you keep nearly getting yourself killed by acting like you don't matter. You matter, Bell."

Bellamy hugged her tighter in response. Honestly, he wasn't completely sure what his purpose was on the ground if he wasn't protecting people regardless of what happened to him. He went into situations knowing that he could die, but knowing that he was protecting someone-saving someone-is what kept him alive.

* * *

"Do you ever rest?"

Bellamy looked behind him and saw Echo walking towards him.

"Not lately."

She hummed in acknowledgement as she came to stand next to him.

"What are we looking at?"

He had been staring out into the forest. If he had been on guard it would have looked less suspicious. As it was, he had just been standing around with his hands in his pockets. He had been waiting. It seemed to be what he did when he had any free time; waiting for Clarke to come back. It felt completely pathetic.

"Nothing, just staring into space. Clearing my head."

"I see."

They lapsed into a companionable silence for a while before Echo turned to face him.

"What was it like, living up there?" She nodded her head upward, toward the sky. "Was it easier?"

"No. There was never enough of anything. Not enough food, not enough water, not enough air. Everything was rationed and regulated. If you broke a law, you were executed. No room for mistakes. No second chances…" Bellamy trailed off. "It's better down here."

She said nothing in return. The silence between them now began to grow uncomfortable. He could feel her staring at him, studying him.

"May I stay with you awhile?"

Bellamy nodded.

She wasn't Clarke, but it was nice to have someone by his side again.


End file.
